The Parable of the Match

I could tell you – in painstaking detail, I could tell you – about the moment of ignition, the sounds and smells and burst of nothing into dancing flame as the match transformed from potential energy to kinetic. I could explain to you the way the match slid across the...

This masquerading as That

A couple of quick reminders in case you’re among the many of us who could use them:1. Planning does NOT equal CatastrophizingPlanning is a form of thoughtful doing with a focus on what we hope to be our future. I hope to have a long life and so I plan my money...

Skipping the Scale & Other Acts of Body Love

A couple of weeks ago, I did something that felt pretty radical. As a nurse beckoned me from the waiting room to a scale on the way to the exam room in my doctor’s office, I asked, “Why?” Why step on the scale? What info to be had from the fact that my weigh goes up a...

Practicing Being Pervious: A Route to a Bigger Heart

It is the rare occasion, indeed, when I run across an opportunity to listen to Ross Gay that I don’t take it and quickly. So I was finishing up lunch the other day and saw a 15-minute interview with him on NPR in which he describes being moved, as in emotionally. He...

Flowing with Emotions: A Practical Guide

Thirty-six hours after I proposed to Theresa in 2019, I noticed my inner critics, my Innerlings, get loud and ornery. They told me things like that I should be embarrassed to announce my engagement given my previous divorce; they asked me how I had the gall to imagine...

The (Freaked Out) Farmer and the Horse

There’s an old Zen story that gets a lot of traction in the world of personal development. You’ve probably heard it before. It goes a little something like this: See, there’s this farmer in this village. He’s got this horse who is integral to his ability to run his...

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